My Wedding Experience
It goes without saying that every girl dreams about their wedding day! It is suppose to be the most magical day of your life, when your world combines with your husband’s. Two families come together to celebrate two people making a lifetime commitment to each other. But there is more to a wedding than meets the eye, so much to plan for and to decide upon. I have compiled my thoughts and experiences through out my wedding planning process to not only share my story, but to also share ideas and lessons learned for future brides!
The Ceremony
Miles and I first had to decide what kind of wedding we wanted to have. Where would we have our ceremony? Our reception? What style of wedding we wanted? What would our ceremony look like? Our main goal was to make sure the whole day felt personable not only for us but also our guests. We wanted to focus on what the day truly symbolized, and not loose the sentiment by focusing to much on the “party” aspect. I did a great deal of research on different cultures wedding ceremonies. We decided not to be married in a church. I choose to write my own complete ceremony, hand picking ideas and traditions that fit Miles and I as a couple. It was really a chance to set the tone for the entire evening for not only the two of us as we take this next step, but also for our guests who are witnessing it all happen. We were really happy with the layout of the ceremony, and got so many rave reviews from our guests, kept telling me it was the best ceremony they had ever seen!
Warming of the rings: We had our wedding bands in a small sashay which was passed around throughout our ceremony for each guest to make a special prayer over them. By the time they reached the front for the exchange of the rings, they had been adorned with love from each person there!
Readings: I had two best friends give reading during the ceremony: the “unity candle” reading and the “hands” reading.
Blessing: After our vows and the exchanging of the rings, before the closing of the ceremony, the guest recited a blessing. The blessing was printed out and placed on each chair as seen in the picture above.
If you would like me to send you a copy of our complete ceremony, leave a comment at the end of this post!
The Decor
I really wanted a warm romantic candle-lit atmosphere. I went back and forth between neutral white colors and antique purple and blush tones. Ultimately, my colors kind of chose me. Had I gotten married a month later, I think I would have had a winter wonderland theme, but what I learned throughout the wedding planning process is that you almost never end up with what you originally thought you wanted.
I didn’t want to spend an arm and a leg on decor and flowers that would just be thrown away after a few hours. So I tried to make decisions with that in mind. Luckily I had my mom and Michael’s Craft store! I get my craftiness from my mom. She has always been someone who could make anything beautiful and special. She is a master party planner and decorator, and knows how to make a room feel warm and welcoming. She has taught me that for any entertaining gathering you should have a welcoming scent, good lighting (usually from candles), a focal centerpiece, and great music! Going off of my “phantom of the opera-anthropology-gastby” decor inspiration, we decided to have romantic candelabras surrounded by rose filled mercury glasses and vanilla scented votive candles.
We bought the candelabras, mercury glass, votives, and candles for each table set up. To save on flowers, we bought fake flowers at Michael’s and then added in real flowers! No one had a clue! Everything from the guestbook table, the center pieces, to the archway, the ceremony isle, to dessert table, we decorated ourselves! It was a lot of work, but boy did we pull it off! My mom’s house was filled with buckets of roses the day before we assembled the centerpeices and bouquets. With the help of my two aunts, grandmother, and sister, we completed everything in record time and minimal stress! It was truly beautiful and amazing to be able to now have some of the centerpieces and arch at my home today to remind Miles and I of our special day. I even was able to gift my bridesmaids and some family members an entire centerpiece each as a keepsake! It felt good to know that we didn’t waste our money on things we would have to give back or that would completely die two days later that we would have to throw away like so many couples have to do after their wedding. We were so proud that we did everything ourselves!
The Dress
Whoa the dress! Another example of me going into it with one idea and come out with something completely different. I really thought I wanted a dress with lace that had some sort of straps and coverage on the top with a more open back. I also thought I wanted a more form fitting dress, but honestly once I started trying wedding dresses on, I started to change my mind. I started to realize that this was my moment to wear a dress that I would never be able to wear again in my everyday life. THIS was the time to get fancy and dreamy. It was my own version of a cinderella moment. A bridal moment. I didn’t want my dress to look like I could have worn it to prom. I wanted to make a statement. I wanted my dress to complement my wedding decor and style.
Armed with my mother, sisters, and Aunt Donna, we decided to get warmed up at Sacks Fifth Avenue. I was able to try on wedding dresses by designers that I have always admired but never thought I’d have the chance to wear. From Oscar de La Renta and Monique Lhuillier to Marchesa, I had my Carrie Bradshaw moment. When I tried on that first dress, I was over come with emotion. I was going to be walking down the isle, in a dream dress, towards my dream man! It was a great first stop to help me understand which direction I wanted to go in, but I just didn’t have the budget for a $15,000 dress that I would wear for one night. Let’s keep it real here!
We made our way over to Kleinfeld in New York City. What an overwhelming place! With a budget in mind, we searched through racks and racks of gowns. Then, my Aunt Donna spotted one hanging on the “put back” rack from another fitting. She ran to get me to show me this dress she had a feeling about. When she took me back to see it, it was gone! Little did she know that I had that same feeling when I walked by it myself, and had my consultant already put it in my fitting room! I had taken the dress she wanted me to try on!
I tried on about 12 dresses at Kleinfeld, and had it down to two amazing dresses. But in the end, I went with the one that my Aunt and I both had an instant feeling about. When I put this dress on and walked out into the center room where my family was waiting for me, the entire feel of the room changed. Other families who where waiting on their brides to come out were walking over to me, telling me that it was the one! It just so happened that the designer of this special dress was also at Kleinfeld… Mark Zunino! He was so sweet, and made special notes for his team just for me to make sure it was exactly what I wanted. If fell in love with the fit, the toile, and detailed crystal and flower appliqués! The little ballerina in me was jumping for joy. Finding “the one” was much more of an emotional experience than I thought it would be. I kept thinking, “This is what I am going to marry Miles in. This is happening!”
The Music
The music is extremely important and helps to set the mood for each part of the wedding. Each song was hand picked with a purpose and special message. Here is a break down of a few of our song choices.
Guests Arriving: Clair De Lune, Some Enchanted Evening, Love is a Many Splendored Thing by Moonlight Serenade Instrumental
Grandparents and Parents Walking Down the Isle: Moon River by Moonlight Serenade Instrumental
Officiant and Groom entrance: Somewhere from West Side Story By Leonard Bernstein instrumental.
Bridal walk: Feels Like Home by Chantal Kreviazuk
Recessional Music: You and I by John Legend cued up to the Chorus
First Dance: Crazy Love by Van Morrison
Father Daughter Dance: Unforgettable by Nat King Cole and Natalie Cole
Mother Son Dance: Forever Young by Bob Dylan
The Personal Touches:
Guest book: I found a photo book that had places to write by each picture you insert. I had a few disposable cameras, a chalk board, chalk, and pens on a table right when the guests walked in. The guests were instructed to write a message to the bride and groom on the chalk board and then take a picture of themselves with the chalk board. They then sign their names, and then later when I had the pictures developed I placed their picture next to their signature! I also found vintage looking picture frames and framed a few quotes from The Great Gatsby that have to do with love and celebration, and placed them on the guest book table!
Wedding Favors: I didn’t want the favor to be something that people leave on the table or throw away once they get home. I wanted it to be personable and special, so I compiled Miles and I’s favorite recipes into a little cookbook! All my guests loved the cook books! I loved getting texts or phone calls from them telling me when they had tried one of the recipes from the book weeks later.
Seating Chart: My mom worked so hard on the seating chart! She made a mini baseball stadium with peanut people to complement on Miles’ profession! The bridal party was on the field while the guest were divided up by sections (table numbers) in the stands! The stadium table also had glass apothecary jars filled with baseballs and cracker jacks! It was so cute!!
The Dessert Table: Miles and I didn’t want a cake. We don’t eat cake a lot, so why have it at our wedding? We wanted pie. We kept it true to ourselves! We had a pie bar of apple, pecan, and pumpkin! I made my daily pilgrimage to Michael’s Craft Store and found wood letters and wood craft sticks that I then hot glued and spray painted with gold glitter paint!
The Program: The wedding ceremony program is something that I feel is a waste of paper! I kept it green and environmentally conscious by making one big poster with the program printed for all our guests to see when they entered the ceremony room. I found a large framed organization board, and covered it with the poster. The I took some ribbon and floral scrapbook decals and decorated the board. It ended up being something that we were able to keep from our wedding and hang in our house!
Reception Video: Miles and I played a video at our reception in which our videographer interviewed us separately and then edited our answers together. It was a chance for us to tell our love story. Our guests loved it! Our videographer did a great job! We saw it for the first time at our reception, making for some laughs and tears!
Things I would do differently knowing what I know now…
Timeline: The one thing that I have to say upset me was how fast it all went! I know everyone says that, but they are right! We should have had a least one more hour in our reception time. We didn’t plan in time for mishaps: my bridesmaids had trouble bustling my dress, the photographer went over time taking pictures after the ceremony, we have big families we had to take pictures with, the speeches were long, etc. I also wanted to surprise my mom with a mother daughter dance to “Mama’s Song” by Carrie Underwood, but there was no time. Having a better timeline with EXTRA time, or even just added time onto our room rental would have been so worth it!
A talk with the DJ: I spent hours compiling all the songs for my wedding and reception. I wanted to make sure that there was something for everyone, that would keep the dance floor full. I forgot to tell the DJ NOT to take requests! 🙁
The Photographer: The photos and video were the most important to me. After all, that is how you remember your day! I found a great husband and wife team: Traci Burke Photography. They did our engagement photos, our wedding day photos, wedding day video, and also a video that we played at our reception in which they interviewed Miles and I about each other. Everything came out beautiful, however I wasn’t as pleased with the wedding day photos and how they handled things that day and after the wedding was over. If I could go back, I wouldn’t have paid them the full amount until after we received everything. It took 6 months to get our video, which they had to re-edit once we saw it. They are good people, but were dodging our concerns for our pictures and video, and didn’t have it completed by the time allotted in our contract. It was frustrating to say the least.
The Bridesmaid Dresses:The bridesmaid dresses were a disaster! Once I found the dress I wanted, and picked out the colors with swatches, I gave the information to my bridesmaids. My two sisters were to be in a vintage washed out blush, however when we got their dresses in the mail, they were a horrible Barbie bubble gum pink! EEKKK! I tried to explain to the wedding dress store that the swatch they showed me and the dress we received did not match at all! They however had no sympathy and said we would have to order two entirely new dresses. To make matters worse, even if we did order new dresses, we wouldn’t have gotten the dresses in time. So I ended up finding a similar dress at Nordstrom and ordered my sisters new dresses! If that wasn’t enough, another one of my bridesmaids didn’t order her dress early enough and couldn’t be in my wedding because she didn’t have a dress. It was extremely upsetting. If I could do it all over again, I would have gotten dresses from a major department store like Nordstom or Macy’s. The customer service and discounts you can apply are a million times worth it. PLUS I think that the dresses are a better quality than getting a bridesmaid dress from a bridal store.
Here is our Wedding Day Highlight Film
